New Year's Eve is here! It is a time for figuring out where I am in this life of mine. It is a time consuming thought process. I spend time reading and researching online how I am supposed to feel or live at my age now. Honestly, I don't feel old even though I have trouble walking due to both of my knees. It has been a long road for me from living a modern homesteading life to where I am now. Yes, there are days I miss it and my horses and especially my cats. I had to accept it and move on. There are things I was expecting when moving here that did not work out the way I pictured. Yet life goes on and I have to accept it or just give up. Giving up is not something I can do. I still have a bunny rabbit and a disabled son to worry about and live for. I am living by my newest motto which is "Never too late".
When you finally have the time to work on yourself things start to change in your life. I am sure if I didn't have so many things to do, my day to day life would drag on. Instead the days go by so fast I say, "Hey hold on day, I have more things to do!" I can easily get caught up in one project for hours and not get anything else done. It doesn't really matter since I now have the time. There are certain things that must be done at certain times and that is of course, household or pet related chores. Simple household chores take me longer than when I was younger. I accept that fact and just do them. I tried to have an aide assist me but that didn't work out. Besides I believe it is good for me to do these physical chores myself while I can. I take many breaks.
One mistake I was making was searching for "home decor for senior citizens" or "single senior women's lifestyles". Why should it matter how old I am or whether I am single or a woman? I am a person and if a young person's style appeals to me that is all that should matter. I have changed my way of thinking since then. My home decor style has changed over the years but not due to my age or the fact that I am now single. One thing that stays constant with me is colors. I will always love bright colors. The only reason my age figures into my home design is because I use a walker. So I need room for it getting from place to place. My mobility chair is kept in the bathroom so I don't use that throughout my whole apartment. Just from the bathroom to the door.
Learning new things is another activity in my life that keeps me going forward instead of just breathing. As I figure out the turns my life takes on I almost always learn something new. I have always loved to cook and even though I am alone here I still like to create recipes of my own. Since I follow the keto lifestyle, I like to get recipes out of my old cookbooks and change the ingredients to keto (low carbs, higher fat). The other new thing I am working on and believe me,,,,,,,,,,,,it taxis my brain! The Linux operating system in my computers. I was thinking of taking a course in it but have found some good YouTube videos on it. When I am working on that I cannot be interrupted at all. I turn the sign on my door to out.
One thing I have learned is to not think of myself as old. I am older, yes. But there are many more people who are a lot older than me. Knowing people of all ages will show you that your age does not define who you are. So I accept that and live for today and will worry about tomorrow when it gets here. I wish you all a very Happy New Year!
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