Did you ever listen to someone who talked like they were VERY successful and knew everything about everything? Yet, they were not successful? In fact, they had nothing and was in their mid thirties. Had no home of their own and going from one job to another. One bad relationship after another. Which was always the other person's fault. Oh, of course, NOTHING was their fault! Then when they stated their views on relationships you could certainly see why.
I have been around someone who talked and thought this way recently. Believe me, it is very hard for me not to say something and end up in a fight with this person. REAL men are nothing like that. My father was a strong, but caring man. He was tough when the situation warranted it. My brother too, though he comes across as a rough character, he has a gentle, caring side as well. Just because you don't let people walk all over you, does not mean you have to be abusive.
Being abusive for no reason other than selfishness and wanting to use someone else, does not give you a license to torment and be cruel to someone else. I often wonder WHY does someone like this have to involve their life with another's? Why don't they just pay a prostitute for sex and leave the good women alone? Life would be so much better for all involved and it would limit them having children. A person like that does not deserve to have even one child........yet most of the time they have a few by different women. Shows their lack of intelligence, don't you think so?
On Oprah's website she has a list of signs of abusive partners/spouses. I can see these signs in a people who have problems dealing with people in general, not just as a spouse, but even a grown child or family member. Be careful how much you give in to them, as you may live to regret it. Tough love is a must in dealing with people of this sort, as well as addicts, and I mean alcohol as well as drugs. Get help from someone if you need it. I was married to an alcoholic and went to Al-anon for help, though they help any type of addiction. Get the help you need now!
Copyright © 2012 Kathleen G. Lupole
All Photographs Copyright © 2012 Kathleen G. Lupole
2 comments:
Hey Kat! Great post! I wish there was such thing as Ala-non when I was growing up. My first husband was an alcoholic as well, but I dared not look for help because it might effect my husband's career. He was the type that had such a tolerence for alcohol that he could drink and drink and even though he was drunk, he could function very well.
I am so glad that you found my posts helpful. I will try and get back into the swing of it again, although it will more than likely be like every other day rather than every day.
God Bless,
PJ
Very true.
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