Reflections of katlupe: July 2023

Saturday, July 29, 2023

Dental Work Canceled Because I Am Too Old!

Long drive to go to the dental clinic

Yesterday I was angry about something. Today I have calmed down about it and let it go. I realized when I was thinking about it last night that it may work in my favor. My dental clinic called yesterday to tell me they (Wilson Dental in Binghamton, NY) had canceled my appointment with the oral surgeon because I am over 70 now. When I started there I was 69 but they kept canceling my appointments so now I am 71. I was all set to get this done soon. Now I have to start over somewhere else.

My dental work was going to be paid for by Fidelis Care (insurance supplement for Medicare and Medicaid). So I had to put up with them making me have an aide to assist me in my home. Even though I found after having several different ones that I did not need or want one. They said I had to have one and they wanted me to have one for fifteen hours a week. Can you imagine? FIFTEEN HOURS A WEEK???? The only reason I even wanted Fidelis Care was for my dental work and maybe for new glasses and eye exam.

The other problem for me is that the only dental clinic I could find that would take Fidelis Care was in other cities (Binghamton or Syracuse for me). It would be much more convenient for me to find a dental office (with a oral surgeon that will extract teeth) locally. So for now, I have decided to go on the hunt for a new supplemental insurance company that will include the dental, vision, hearing and podiatry without making me hire an aide. After I find one then I will search for a local dental clinic. There is one not far from my home and I have my eye on that one even though their information does not say they do extractions or treat us people over 70.

Wilson Dental in Binghamton, NY

I must admit I did not feel completely comfortable with Wilson Dental because it is like a factory for dental work. One cubicle after the other of dental chairs and equipment. As you walk through going to the cubicle you will be treated in, you pass by many others having their work done. It is a low cost clinic and they are busy. The waiting room is always full and the wait is long. Often my appointments were canceled unexpectedly. I had an appointment for a cleaning and they did not have time to do it so they just looked at my teeth and made another appointment. Just try to call them! That is a long process waiting for them to pick up and many times they never did. So maybe it was God telling me not to use them. Whatever it was, I am not upset about it now. Just moving on to something better.

Wednesday, July 26, 2023

Rev Up Your Daily Life!

Venture out of your home!

It is inevitable that as you age there will be times you wish you were younger. No matter where you are, whatever your circumstance, you wish for what you don't have or what you used to have. Good health, more money, better job, new car, big house, good children or a faithful, loyal spouse. The list can go on and on. It is good to a point to want a better life. We always think of things that could change what we have presently. Many times we have settled for what we had years ago when we were much younger. Maybe that hope of a change was somewhere in the back of our minds for years. Yet here you are at retirement age and no change in sight. No hope of change even lingers as a possibility now. As you watch your friends plan their trips to exciting new places you feel regret and sadness. Since you know that is not happening for you. Not now, not ever. Your daily life is all you have and it depresses you.

No matter what you did when you were younger to create the life you have presently, this is not the time to dwell on it. It is a done deal. Nothing will change it now. Instead get to work on finding the life that is within your reach today. Maybe you just need to get out more often and make new friends. Does it have to be friends in your age group? No, you can make friends based on your interests that includes people of all ages. If you are intimidated about walking into a group of people under your age, don't be. Hold your head high and remember you probably have valuable experience to share with these youngsters.

Library right across the street from my home!

Make a list of local events or groups that meet nearby that you can attend and pick one to start with. Your library or museums in your area are a vast source of information to expand your lifeline. Doing new things, meeting new people, going to new places or events can rev up your daily life to another level. Oh, you don't want to go because you use a walker or a mobility chair? Most places now are disabled friendly but you can call ahead to find out for sure. Want to learn new things? Take classes at your local college or high schools. I don't know if night classes are still a thing but I remember many times taking a ceramics class in my younger years. There were always a mix of young and old at these classes. Just search for a niche that catches your eye.

Learn to use a computer!

Please tell me that you know how to use a computer! Don't be one of those people who proudly declare, "I don't know anything about a computer!" I know a few of those people and some of them are always at my door wanting me to search something online for them. Or make a purchase on Amazon for them. There are literally millions of online classes, videos and forums for any subject you are interested in. If you do not know how to use a computer, now is the time to learn. Your local library is a good place to start. Call and find out if they have or know of a class for computer beginner users. They may have one that is specially targeted for retirement age people.

Take that step out of your comfort zone!

What it all comes down to is that no matter what age you are now, learning and participating in new things is good for you. Good for your well being but especially for your brain. If you have not been learning new things in a long time don't worry about that. It is like riding a bicycle. Once you know how to do it, you can always do it. You might be rusty at first but it doesn't take long to catch on. Seeing new places, new people and learning new things is so good for you. It gives you something to look forward to and expands your life beyond your four walls. Try it one new class or event at a time!

Sunday, July 23, 2023

Take Some Time to Chill Out!

There are some days I want to just chill. Not have any appointments or plans. Not have to talk to or entertain anyone. Eat simple food that doesn't take much preparation. Just be me. By myself. Take the day as it comes. Whatever comes to my mind I can do. I find when there are some busy days it tires me out and I just want to be home and alone. Someone used to mention wanting their "alone time" and not wanting to do anything. Yet when that person had any free time it was filled with doing chores of some kind. Well, I have plenty of "alone time" now in my present situation. I still value it and make good use of it. When you live with other people, including a spouse or other family members, it can be difficult to make time for yourself. If you do, it will recharge your state of mind so you can deal with the outside world.

There is so many products that have been developed over the years to make our lives easier and more convenient. Saves time. Time for what? Time for doing some other chore? Or for creating free time to do something you really wanted to do? I used to think I enjoyed cooking for other people. Now when I look back, I think not so much. Could be that I told myself I enjoyed it but it was a lot of work. Work hard creating a meal and it was gone in half an hour. Then the clean up. At least now when I cook a meal I can just heat it up for the next three days. That means if I don't feel like cooking or creating some big meal I can do what I like.

When someone asks what do you do all day? I have to think about it. Yet I know that person cannot appreciate my answer because what I do is different each day. Another person might think what I said I did was boring to them but probably not to me. I don't know whether it is an aging thing or health thing but I try not to talk about health conditions to others. If I talk about it too much I end up dwelling on it. I feel like, "Yeah, I have Osteoarthritis in both knees and Lymphedema but that does not define who I am." There are many people who are worse off than I am. I can deal with my own health issues privately.

In life, change is constant. Especially in the aging process, though you may not notice it at first. When you are younger it seems like it is far in the distance. It catches up with you pretty fast though. Your situations change slowly at first. Then all of a sudden you notice big changes as if they just happened. For instance, relationships with your loved ones. You go from seeing and hearing from them every day to no contact for days. Someone who used to call you five or six times a day barely calls you once. They have moved on to a life that doesn't include you anymore or at least not as much as before. It is a process you have to accept.

Accepting changes within your life must be done or else you can end up depressed and become a negative person. I have had many people come into my life and leave over the years. That is the reason for keeping yourself independent. If you depend on one person you will be sorry if they are not there for you anymore. If you have physical problems and cannot do everything yourself, there are ways to get help. Usually your local Office for the Aging will be able to help you find what you need. If you can afford it then money spent on a private aide, driver or handyman would be money well spent.

Often times the changes happening are not your own but the other person's or people in your life. If it is someone you are involved with often you will see the changes in them coming and not have it sneak up on you. Prepare for it as soon as you notice it. Don't pretend it is not happening. Many times it could be your spouse and those changes will surely affect you and your life. Maybe that person, spouse or others just get tired of your situation and doing for you. Or maybe their own health is affecting them in ways you do not know. So being independent and able to move on is the only thing you can do. Self-care has got to come first especially as you become older.

Tuesday, July 18, 2023

The Independent Disabled Lifestyle

Becoming disabled as you get older might be something you cannot do anything about. If that becomes a way of life for you, there are ways to still stay as independent as possible for you. Every situation is different. Your reality may be different from others or your spouse. I urge couples to establish your own care plan even if you are living with your spouse. If something unexpectedly happens to him or her, you will be able to handle your needs. At the very least you will know what you need and how to do it.

When mobility is one of your health issues, as it is for me, there are a number of options available. As most people do, I started with a cane that I used for many years. Sometimes I still use it in my apartment or for taking something downstairs. Most of the time though I use a rolling walker. I wrote about this in a previous post, Disability Independence With A Rolling Walker. What I especially like about this walker is that it has a seat with a bag under it. I can put my purse or camera or whatever I am carrying in the bag. It is also a good safety measure when walking outside where someone could just grab your purse. If I get tired or my legs or knees are hurting I can sit for a spell. It is comfortable and I even use it as my chair when going to someone's home or to any type of event.

I also have a stationary walker that I keep by my bed so I have something to grab onto to get out of bed. It folds up if I need to get it out of the way. Having aids like this can help you get around in your home. I live in a small studio apartment and I have kept it as open as possible. I could use a wheelchair in here if needed. Even in my kitchen and bathroom. My shower has a shower chair in it and I am fortunate to have a large open shower. So I could go from a wheelchair into my shower with no problem at all.

When I moved here five years ago I chose not to own a vehicle. I figured living downtown I could walk everywhere. Well that was my plan but my ability to walk around is severely limited now. I can use the walker to get to some places but not all. The grocery store is farther than I can go with the walker. So I got a mobile chair, which I call "Jazzy" and it has been a lifesaver. I can drive to the store and back as quickly as if I had a car. Last year I had to have the tires and the front casters replaced as well as new batteries. Those expenses remind me to be careful on the city sidewalks and streets. People probably wonder why I am always looking down in front of me. I am watching for potholes, rocks, glass and other debris that is on the sidewalk in front of me.

With a mobile chair or scooter you must be very careful because it is like driving a bicycle, car or motorcycle. You don't want to go too fast and hit something or someone. Do not look around while moving and make sure you are looking in the direction you are driving. I always slow up before a driveway or an ally because someone could be coming out of it real fast. I had to stop suddenly when a bicycle came out of an ally that was next to a big building and rarely used. Unexpected! I stopped in time. There is a hidden drive into a parking lot to city hall along my route to the store. There is a large bush hiding it and if you don't know it is there it is dangerous. The bush hides you coming down the sidewalk so cars pulling out don't expect you. They can see the street looking both ways. So just be cautious.

In my apartment I keep "Jazzy" in the bathroom in front of the shower. When I take a shower I have to move it a little ways away from the shower toward the sink. That means turning it on and moving it. I do not do it by sitting on it but standing in front of it. So moving it toward me could be dangerous if I was not paying attention. If I ran over my foot that would be one of the worst things I could imagine happening! Always watch your feet!! I charge it with the battery charger every time I have used it to go anywhere. Just plug it in after I get back home. That way it is always charged and ready to use.

The design of my small studio apartment is perfect for a disabled person and that is what they had in mind for all the apartments in my building. Not all of them are alike and the ones that seem the easiest to get around in are the studios. I believe I have taken things a step further in the way I use things and the aids I buy to assist me. Keeping an open floor plan is very important. So no coffee tables or unnecessary pieces of furniture in the way. No electric cords across the floor. Simple and easy is my motto!

Saturday, July 15, 2023

Problems Cause Worry & Stress

Often times I have a problem that is stressing me out. I worry over it constantly. Especially if it is a very serious problem. Though aren't all problems serious? It takes up my whole day and I go to sleep with it on my mind. Some problems are the type you really can't do anything about. They take time to resolve themselves. Besides I can't change the outcome of it no matter what I do or don't do. So instead of wasting time with worry I am becoming more productive. I pray about my problem whatever it is then let God take over from there. He knows what he is doing.

Some problems have a way of working themselves out on their own. I will worry and worry and then some time later the problem is gone. If I forget about it because it is not so prevalent at the moment I realize it is not important any longer. I like that type of problem. Wish they all were like that. Life will always have problems that stress you out. Stress is the worst thing for your health. What are you going to do? For me the answer is to keep busy. When I am busy doing things I don't worry so much. So that is what I am doing. My problems are not so bad compared to the problems others have.

Keto Chow Apple Pie Ice Cream

Being a carb addict and emotional eater is a big problem if you are dealing with problems in your life. I have learned that using food to soothe your state of mind is not going to solve anything. I no longer snack or binge on anything. Not even ice cream, which was always my go to in those cases. If I want ice cream, I plan for it in advance. I use Keto Chow meal replacement shakes for ice cream. I can eat the whole pint of ice cream for one of my meals and it is okay. It is more than okay since it is a healthy alternative. Keto Chow has a really good taste so it does not have that "diet" taste that most low calorie or low fat ice creams have. Plus it is better for you. It is my belief that if you or someone you love or care for is still drinking Ensure or Boost, then it is time to change that. I spent many years working as a CNA and seeing what is in those drinks is scary!

One way I cope with my problems is by listening to music. It really does help. I like to color in adult coloring books while the music is playing. It gives me that time to think and reflect on whatever is troubling me. Sometimes I make problems out of things that are not my problems at all. My mother told me not to worry about something until there was something to worry about! Boy, that sure is the truth. Wasting all that time and becoming stressed over situations that never happen. I see a lot of people are doing that. Worrying and stressing, that is. Usually about things in the news. That is the media's intention.

In the park!

Living in an apartment building for seniors and disabled as I do now, I see a lot of people get upset by rumors that get passed from one person to another. Just like the old telephone game. It gets worse and worse as it is passed along. People make assumptions based on how a prospective tenant dresses or looks. Nobody takes it into account what that person's financial situation, illness or disability is. I looked a sight myself till I got moved in and was able to have my hair cut and new clothing.

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