Do we all have inspiring people we look up to when we are young? As time went on I discovered there was no one left to inspire me anymore. Is it because I became older and could see that everyone had been touched by the cool indifference and uncaring attitude that prevails today? There used to be women who stood out in the crowds. Who young women used as their own role models. Eventually they all showed another side as I grew older. The things I didn't know or realize while I was still young. The very women who I chose to copy. I wanted to be them when I grew up. It didn't take me too long to realize they were not what I imagined. Had they changed? No, I did. I matured.
Having gone through a couple of bad marriages, I learned a lot. I learned other women will sometimes target their friends' husbands. Other women will lie and steal to make themselves look better off than they are. Other women, even your closest friends will not tell you the truth. Even when asked face to face. Life teaches you over time the things to look out for. When you are young you don't see that. As you grow older you have time to think. You have time to learn from your past mistakes.
Life is not easy and if someone tells you it is they are lying. It is not easy even for the richest or most beautiful beings on earth. We all have problems and issues to deal with. It is not up to you to bring problems or complaints to every person you are in contact with. I keep things to myself. I don't feel I need to share my concerns or problems with others. Even the people closest to me. I have always been like that. Maybe due to me writing in journals it feels like I have talked it over. With myself! Maybe even on this blog with my readers! On the other hand I like to listen to others' problems and see if I can help them out in some way. Granted I cannot help them with financial problems or physical help but I can try to give them support or steer them in the right direction. That is if they ask for my advice first! Never offer it without being asked.
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| Yarrow growing wild |
These days I choose not to feel anything more from a celebrity than appreciate their talent. I have been disappointed by too many of them. So many times I discover what their views are and then never watch or listen to them again. I had a huge collection of Madonna CDs and crushed them up so nobody could take them out of the dumpster. She lost me as a fan for life after stating her views. Same with Cher. Apparently they speak without thinking first. Bad move on their part! The issues they are voicing their anger on at the time will be over and done with in a short while. The blemish on their career and lost of some fans will last forever.
It makes me wonder if the need for another woman as an inspiration disappears as we age ourselves. Now I am to an age when I feel much smarter than before. I made many bad decisions in my past and they are done with. Not going to dwell on them. When I was younger I may have. I am not going to live forever so not going to waste time on what may have been, Yes, I am where I am right now due to choices I made. Looking back at those times I wish I had not. Nothing can be done about those now. So doing the best I can with what I have. Life is ever changing and we change with it or we become negative humans. I choose to embrace the changes in my life now and stay positive.
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