I read something I wrote eleven years ago and it still is true today. It caused a pain in my heart. Like I had been stabbed. It was something I needed to change in my life and was miserable about. Instead I lived with it for all those years. I am hanging my head in shame! No excuses! I know everyone would say to me to make it work. Keep trying. Don't give up. Easier said than done. Especially if things are so bad that you are always upset, mad, sad, crying in your pillow every night.........then get the heck out of that situation! No matter what it is. A relationship, a lifestyle, a job, a location. Just cut your losses and get out.
These type of situations hurt and make you sad while are living it. If you don't make the change, then your life is hopeless. So you must bite the bullet and make the change. If you find it hard to do, that does not matter. Do you really want to keep doing what you hate? Every day for the rest of you life? Living a life you hate is like just waiting to die. That is why so many people sit in front of a television all day long. Just doing the same old trivial things they do day after day. Time marches on.
If you are miserable.........get up right now and do something, anything to change it. Start making changes and once you do, you will never look back. It is not meant for our lives to be so boring, mundane and miserable. They are meant to be lived to the fullest every day! Make a list of whatever you need to do to get started. I have been doing this for a long time now. The difference is, this is my first year that I have actually started making the changes I must, to go on with my life. At times, my pain of my situation has been staggering. I do not really suffer from depression, it more like sadness of wanting to make changes in my life and not knowing how to get started. Or even being able to do so due to my finances.
|My Daddy's chestnut tree that he planted|
What I have learned in my own search for happiness, independence and freedom is that at times in your life you must accept help from others to get yourself started. Once you are out there, then perhaps you can find your own way. Otherwise you never will. Not getting started will keep you in a miserable life forever. Life is so short that you must take your chances when they arise and strike out to create that life you see in your head, mind and dreams. Yes, it is possible but you must at least try!
Copyright © 2018 Kathleen G. Lupole
All Photographs Copyright © 2018 Kathleen G. Lupole