End of the Year Thoughts and Challenges

New Year's Eve is here! It is a time for figuring out where I am in this life of mine. It is a time consuming thought process. I spend time reading and researching online how I am supposed to feel or live at my age now. Honestly, I don't feel old even though I have trouble walking due to both of my knees. It has been a long road for me from living a modern homesteading life to where I am now. Yes, there are days I miss it and my horses and especially my cats. I had to accept it and move on. There are things I was expecting when moving here that did not work out the way I pictured. Yet life goes on and I have to accept it or just give up. Giving up is not something I can do. I still have a bunny rabbit and a disabled son to worry about and live for. I am living by my newest motto which is "Never too late". 

When you finally have the time to work on yourself things start to change in your life. I am sure if I didn't have so many things to do, my day to day life would drag on. Instead the days go by so fast I say, "Hey hold on day, I have more things to do!" I can easily get caught up in one project for hours and not get anything else done. It doesn't really matter since I now have the time. There are certain things that must be done at certain times and that is of course, household or pet related chores. Simple household chores take me longer than when I was younger. I accept that fact and just do them. I tried to have an aide assist me but that didn't work out. Besides I believe it is good for me to do these physical chores myself while I can. I take many breaks.

One mistake I was making was searching for "home decor for senior citizens" or "single senior women's lifestyles". Why should it matter how old I am or whether I am single or a woman?  I am a person and if a young person's style appeals to me that is all that should matter. I have changed my way of thinking since then. My home decor style has changed over the years but not due to my age or the fact that I am now single. One thing that stays constant with me is colors. I will always love bright colors. The only reason my age figures into my home design is because I use a walker. So I need room for it getting from place to place. My mobility chair is kept in the bathroom so I don't use that throughout my whole apartment. Just from the bathroom to the door. 

Learning new things is another activity in my life that keeps me going forward instead of just breathing. As I figure out the turns my life takes on I almost always learn something new. I have always loved to cook and even though I am alone here I still like to create recipes of my own. Since I follow the keto lifestyle, I like to get recipes out of my old cookbooks and change the ingredients to keto (low carbs, higher fat). The other new thing I am working on and believe me,,,,,,,,,,,,it taxis my brain! The Linux operating system in my computers. I was thinking of taking a course in it but have found some good YouTube videos on it. When I am working on that I cannot be interrupted at all. I turn the sign on my door to out. 

One thing I have learned is to not think of myself as old. I am older, yes. But there are many more people who are a lot older than me. Knowing people of all ages will show you that your age does not define who you are. So I accept that and live for today and will worry about tomorrow when it gets here. I wish you all a very Happy New Year! 

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

The Keto Lifestyle Is the Good Health Diet

Keto products I use regularly

How did I transition from the standard American diet (SAD) to a Keto lifestyle? It was not overnight and it was definitely not easy. I started eating low carbs many years ago but would stop and start again and again. I did not feel good when off it and I knew this. Yet something kept me eating those foods I knew I should not be eating.......pizza, ice cream, potato chips, chocolate candy and Whoppers with the bun and french fries (oh, how I loved those french fries!). What was it about those foods that made me not able to pass them by? I would blame it on whoever I was with. Especially when eating in restaurants. I knew what to order when I walked in the door. Yet when the waitress came to take the order I would hear myself ordering a completely different meal! I'd hate myself later that night. 

Fast food is not an option for me!

It is true though that your family and friends really do not want you to eat differently from them. I find that is true about many other things in life besides what foods you choose to eat. Everyone tries to get their family and friends to do what they do whether you like it or not. Somehow you have to get yourself beyond that. Even now, I am 99% living my keto lifestyle, but that 1%? Sometimes I slip off. Do I hate myself later? Not anymore. Because I am not perfect nor will I ever be perfect. I just go on as if it never happened. Living by myself makes it easier for me to eat the way I want. No influences or temptations from someone else. It is the rare person who will give up their favorite foods for someone else. Yet they expect you to give up your health and well being for them. 

My keto kitchen!

I don't call myself by any specific diet other than the keto lifestyle. There are many names for it....low carb, Atkins, Ketogenic, keto, ketovore, carnivore, lion diet, etc. It all boils down to protein, fat and low carbs. The Proper Human Diet. I no longer count calories. I don't care what they are. Some days I don't eat as much as other days. It all evens out over time. I do use a tracker. Cronometer. Just to have a record of what I ate each day. I don't care anymore about keeping track of protein or fat since usually I eat over 100 grams of each. So the days I don't get the 100 grams I am okay with that too. Another thing I don't do is to weight myself. I threw my scale out in the dumpster. A scale is really a useless tool that many people have an obsession with. A better measurement is your clothing. Save some clothing in smaller sizes and try them on at different intervals. Not daily! 

My go to dessert is Keto Chow Ice Cream!

When people say to me that keto didn't work for them. I know what they aren't saying. That is that they did not want to give it a chance to work. They wanted it to be easy and magically heal them and take their weight off in an instant. It does not work that way. Maybe it didn't work because every night they made a dessert......a keto dessert is still a dessert. Maybe they took those cheat days everyone is always talking about. Perhaps their friend took cheat days and still lost weight but they did not. Their body is not the same as their friend's body. We are all unique human beings.

Pizza Bowl Keto Style

For me, over time I have been tweaking the keto lifestyle for myself. I don't follow what anyone says. I might try something that I hear about and test it on myself. I don't take challenges anymore either. I just keep finding new recipes and working on them to fit my taste. Keto meals can and do taste good. But you have to cook! Luckily it is something I love to do. So I will continue to live the keto lifestyle. One thing I want to remind others of is that this way of eating is not meant for weight loss. It is meant for health and weight loss is just a by product of that. 

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

Living In Norwich, NY

Norwich, NY

When choosing where to move when I left my homestead I chose the small city of Norwich (NY) because I was familiar with it. It is more like a small town than a city but everyone refers to it as a city and it is the county seat. My apartment building is centrally located so I knew if I lived there I could get to stores, library, restaurants, movie theater and the county office building without a car. I knew I did not want the expense or headache of owning one. It has a county bus system and one of its stops is right at my building. There are a couple of taxi services as well. So having that in mind when I moved really helped me choose this apartment building. I wanted to have as much independence as possible. 

Norwich Senior Housing

Even though the apartment building I live in is called senior living (which includes disabled people of all ages as well), it is not the same as assisted living. Sometimes I think the people living here want it to be that way. No, you are renting an apartment just like any other apartment building. It is subsidized which the amount you pay for rent is based on your income. There is also assistance available for utilities and food but you have to apply for those yourself. It has nothing to do with the building. Lately they have rented apartments to disabled people who break rules because they cannot read the notices or understand them. Makes me think this was really not a good choice for them or they need a little assistance getting settled in. Sometimes such a person is embarrassed to admit they can't read or understand something so it is hard to offer help to them. 

Living here gives me the choice to do what I want when I want. I don't have to take part in any activities if I choose not to. Though the activities in our building came to a halt back in 2020. Occasionally we have Bingo but not on a regular basis. I have always been an introvert so spending my time alone is what I like to do. I am always busy with something and I never have that feeling of loneliness. I admit to spending a good share of time on the computer but have been making an effort to get outside more often. Especially while we have nice weather. Some other senior apartment buildings around here offer many more activities to their tenants. I believe that is due to their management company being more interested in their renters than our management is. I would be thankful if they would just keep our elevator running and replace the washing machines and dryers in the laundry room.

I watch decorating shows on YouTube constantly and love making changes in my apartment. Since the tiny house movement started some years back there are a lot of new options for anyone choosing to live small. Some of the tiny houses are smaller than my 338 square foot studio apartment. I love open floor plans and that is what I have here. It was perfect for me and my house bunny, Rabbit. Even though it is a small studio apartment, it has a kitchen for a serious cook. That was important to me and I use it daily. The bathroom is quite large for a studio also. I have room to keep my mobility chair in it. So I really have no complaints and work hard to make my apartment a home, not just a place to sleep and eat. 

Peaceful Forest Homestead

Yes, I never dreamed I would be forced to leave my homesteading life. There were so many factors that forced that decision and I am sure I have mentioned them on previous blogs. Debt was one of them. Also the decline I was having in my ability to walk made me dread being immobilized and living without running water among other things. I never felt secure there. Now I do. I was thrilled to move here a little over five years ago and I still am. 

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

Don't Miss Out On Life

One thing that happens with people who live alone and especially senior citizens, is that they don't go outside of their comfort zone. It feels safe in there. I know. I have had to step out of it many times in my life. I step out and am thankful I did but then I create another comfort zone. I believe that part of life is continually pushing myself to try new things and activities. At least try it for a period of time. Yes, of course, I want to feel safe and stay with what I know. But how many times did you try something new and wish you had done it a long time ago? My answer is more times than I like to think.

Martin Kappel Theater

This last week I did it again. Twice. Stepped out of my comfort zone. The first thing I did was to buy a ticket to go to the musical, The Wizard of Oz that was playing in the Martin Kappel Theater that is in the other half of the apartment building I live in. The Norwich Theater Company put on an excellent production and I enjoyed it very much. The theater was crowded and it seemed most of the people knew each other. People greeting each other and were happy to see one another. It was nice to see and no, I did not feel left out. Actually I enjoyed it because it was a happy environment to spend a few hours. I am a “people watcher” and there were a lot of people to watch that day. 

Norwich Center where the theater is

Because I was using a walker I was told to go in when they announce season ticket holders. Then I was directed to a seat in the back row on the aisle. It was perfect for me because I do not like being in the middle of a crowd. They had a 20 minute intermission and the lines to the bathrooms were long. If I had needed to, I would have gone upstairs to my apartment since it was not even five minutes away. I did not let the fact that I was using a walker hold me back. In fact, it made everyone be friendlier to me and try to help me get through the crowd of people. 

Guernsey Memorial Library

The other thing I did was to go to the library and get a new library card. I had that on my list ever since I moved here but never did it. I don’t know why but in recent times the ramp to the library had homeless people camped out on it all hours of the day. The library has been actively trying to discourage that so the ramp was clear. I am happy to say that I now have a library card and will be going there. I always loved libraries and spent hours in various ones over the years. This library is right across the street from my apartment so will be convenient. Right now they are doing major construction inside so I am anxious to see what they have done once it is finished. In the meantime, I am going to check out their online site.

I have found that if I visualize the activity or experience before I do it I will enjoy it more. In fact, I will be looking forward to it. If I went through life expecting to have the worst experiences than that is what I will have. Instead I visualize a rewarding experience and that is usually how it turns out. In my mind I imagine what it will be like when I step inside the building like the theater or the library. Will people frown at me and say, "What is she doing here?" Or will they say, "Oh good a new person is here today!" And come forward to greet me or ask if they can help me. It is usually the latter. 

The park on the corner from my apartment

What have you done lately to step out of your comfort zone? The longer you put it off the harder it is to do it. After you do whatever it is, maybe like me you will be saying, Why didn’t I do that sooner?” Don’t miss out on life because you are stuck in your comfort zone!     

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole 

Dental Work Canceled Because I Am Too Old!

Long drive to go to the dental clinic

Yesterday I was angry about something. Today I have calmed down about it and let it go. I realized when I was thinking about it last night that it may work in my favor. My dental clinic called yesterday to tell me they (Wilson Dental in Binghamton, NY) had canceled my appointment with the oral surgeon because I am over 70 now. When I started there I was 69 but they kept canceling my appointments so now I am 71. I was all set to get this done soon. Now I have to start over somewhere else. 

My dental work was going to be paid for by Fidelis Care (insurance supplement for Medicare and Medicaid). So I had to put up with them making me have an aide to assist me in my home. Even though I found after having several different ones that I did not need or want one. They said I had to have one and they wanted me to have one for fifteen hours a week. Can you imagine? FIFTEEN HOURS A WEEK???? The only reason I even wanted Fidelis Care was for my dental work and maybe for new glasses and eye exam. 

The other problem for me is that the only dental clinic I could find that would take Fidelis Care was in other cities (Binghamton or Syracuse for me). It would be much more convenient for me to find a dental office (with a oral surgeon that will extract teeth) locally. So for now, I have decided to go on the hunt for a new supplemental insurance company that will include the dental, vision, hearing and podiatry without making me hire an aide. After I find one then I will search for a local dental clinic. There is one not far from my home and I have my eye on that one even though their information does not say they do extractions or treat us people over 70. 

Wilson Dental in Binghamton, NY

I must admit I did not feel completely comfortable with Wilson Dental because it is like a factory for dental work. One cubicle after the other of dental chairs and equipment. As you walk through going to the cubicle you will be treated in, you pass by many others having their work done. It is a low cost clinic and they are busy. The waiting room is always full and the wait is long. Often my appointments were canceled unexpectedly. I had an appointment for a cleaning and they did not have time to do it so they just looked at my teeth and made another appointment. Just try to call them! That is a long process waiting for them to pick up and many times they never did. So maybe it was God telling me not to use them. Whatever it was, I am not upset about it now. Just moving on to something better.  

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

Rev Up Your Daily Life!

Venture out of your home!

It is inevitable that as you age there will be times you wish you were younger. No matter where you are, whatever your circumstance, you wish for what you don't have or what you used to have. Good health, more money, better job, new car, big house, good children or a faithful, loyal spouse. The list can go on and on. It is good to a point to want a better life. We always think of things that could change what we have presently. Many times we have settled for what we had years ago when we were much younger. Maybe that hope of a change was somewhere in the back of our minds for years. Yet here you are at retirement age and no change in sight. No hope of change even lingers as a possibility now. As you watch your friends plan their trips to exciting new places you feel regret and sadness. Since you know that is not happening for you. Not now, not ever. Your daily life is all you have and it depresses you. 

No matter what you did when you were younger to create the life you have presently, this is not the time to dwell on it. It is a done deal. Nothing will change it now. Instead get to work on finding the life that is within your reach today. Maybe you just need to get out more often and make new friends. Does it have to be friends in your age group? No, you can make friends based on your interests that includes people of all ages. If you are intimidated about walking into a group of people under your age, don't be. Hold your head high and remember you probably have valuable experience to share with these youngsters. 

Library right across the street from my home!

Make a list of local events or groups that meet nearby that you can attend and pick one to start with. Your library or museums in your area are a vast source of information to expand your lifeline. Doing new things, meeting new people, going to new places or events can rev up your daily life to another level. Oh, you don't want to go because you use a walker or a mobility chair? Most places now are disabled friendly but you can call ahead to find out for sure. Want to learn new things? Take classes at your local college or high schools. I don't know if night classes are still a thing but I remember many times taking a ceramics class in my younger years. There were always a mix of young and old at these classes. Just search for a niche that catches your eye.

Learn to use a computer!

Please tell me that you know how to use a computer! Don't be one of those people who proudly declare, "I don't know anything about a computer!" I know a few of those people and some of them are always at my door wanting me to search something online for them. Or make a purchase on Amazon for them. There are literally millions of online classes, videos and forums for any subject you are interested in. If you do not know how to use a computer, now is the time to learn. Your local library is a good place to start. Call and find out if they have or know of a class for computer beginner users. They may have one that is specially targeted for retirement age people. 

Take that step out of your comfort zone!

What it all comes down to is that no matter what age you are now, learning and participating in new things is good for you. Good for your well being but especially for your brain. If you have not been learning new things in a long time don't worry about that. It is like riding a bicycle. Once you know how to do it, you can always do it. You might be rusty at first but it doesn't take long to catch on. Seeing new places, new people and learning new things is so good for you. It gives you something to look forward to and expands your life beyond your four walls. Try it one new class or event at a time!

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

Take Some Time to Chill Out!

 

There are some days I want to just chill. Not have any appointments or plans. Not have to talk to or entertain anyone. Eat simple food that doesn't take much preparation. Just be me. By myself. Take the day as it comes. Whatever comes to my mind I can do. I find when there are some busy days it tires me out and I just want to be home and alone. Someone used to mention wanting their "alone time" and not wanting to do anything. Yet when that person had any free time it was filled with doing chores of some kind. Well, I have plenty of "alone time" now in my present situation. I still value it and make good use of it. When you live with other people, including a spouse or other family members, it can be difficult to make time for yourself. If you do, it will recharge your state of mind so you can deal with the outside world.  

There is so many products that have been developed over the years to make our lives easier and more convenient. Saves time. Time for what? Time for doing some other chore? Or for creating free time to do something you really wanted to do? I used to think I enjoyed cooking for other people. Now when I look back, I think not so much. Could be that I told myself I enjoyed it but it was a lot of work. Work hard creating a meal and it was gone in half an hour. Then the clean up. At least now when I cook a meal I can just heat it up for the next three days. That means if I don't feel like cooking or creating some big meal I can do what I like. 

When someone asks what do you do all day? I have to think about it. Yet I know that person cannot appreciate my answer because what I do is different each day. Another person might think what I said I did was boring to them but probably not to me. I don't know whether it is an aging thing or health thing but I try not to talk about health conditions to others. If I talk about it too much I end up dwelling on it. I feel like, "Yeah, I have Osteoarthritis in both knees and Lymphedema but that does not define who I am." There are many people who are worse off than I am. I can deal with my own health issues privately.

In life, change is constant. Especially in the aging process, though you may not notice it at first. When you are younger it seems like it is far in the distance. It catches up with you pretty fast though. Your situations change slowly at first. Then all of a sudden you notice big changes as if they just happened. For instance, relationships with your loved ones. You go from seeing and hearing from them every day to no contact for days. Someone who used to call you five or six times a day barely calls you once. They have moved on to a life that doesn't include you anymore or at least not as much as before. It is a process you have to accept. 

Accepting changes within your life must be done or else you can end up depressed and become a negative person. I have had many people come into my life and leave over the years. That is the reason for keeping yourself independent. If you depend on one person you will be sorry if they are not there for you anymore. If you have physical problems and cannot do everything yourself, there are ways to get help. Usually your local Office for the Aging will be able to help you find what you need. If you can afford it then money spent on a private aide, driver or handyman would be money well spent. 

Often times the changes happening are not your own but the other person's or people in your life. If it is someone you are involved with often you will see the changes in them coming and not have it sneak up on you. Prepare for it as soon as you notice it. Don't pretend it is not happening. Many times it could be your spouse and those changes will surely affect you and your life. Maybe that person, spouse or others just get tired of your situation and doing for you. Or maybe their own health is affecting them in ways you do not know. So being independent and able to move on is the only thing you can do. Self-care has got to come first especially as you become older. 

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole

The Independent Disabled Lifestyle

Becoming disabled as you get older might be something you cannot do anything about. If that becomes a way of life for you, there are ways to still stay as independent as possible for you. Every situation is different. Your reality may be different from others or your spouse. I urge couples to establish your own care plan even if you are living with your spouse. If something unexpectedly happens to him or her, you will be able to handle your needs. At the very least you will know what you need and how to do it.

When mobility is one of your health issues, as it is for me, there are a number of options available. As most people do, I started with a cane that I used for many years. Sometimes I still use it in my apartment or for taking something downstairs. Most of the time though I use a rolling walker. I wrote about this in a previous post, Disability Independence With A Rolling Walker. What I especially like about this walker is that it has a seat with a bag under it. I can put my purse or camera or whatever I am carrying in the bag. It is also a good safety measure when walking outside where someone could just grab your purse. If I get tired or my legs or knees are hurting I can sit for a spell. It is comfortable and I even use it as my chair when going to someone's home or to any type of event.

I also have a stationary walker that I keep by my bed so I have something to grab onto to get out of bed. It folds up if I need to get it out of the way. Having aids like this can help you get around in your home. I live in a small studio apartment and I have kept it as open as possible. I could use a wheelchair in here if needed. Even in my kitchen and bathroom. My shower has a shower chair in it and I am fortunate to have a large open shower. So I could go from a wheelchair into my shower with no problem at all.

When I moved here five years ago I chose not to own a vehicle. I figured living downtown I could walk everywhere. Well that was my plan but my ability to walk around is severely limited now. I can use the walker to get to some places but not all. The grocery store is farther than I can go with the walker. So I got a mobile chair, which I call "Jazzy" and it has been a lifesaver. I can drive to the store and back as quickly as if I had a car. Last year I had to have the tires and the front casters replaced as well as new batteries. Those expenses remind me to be careful on the city sidewalks and streets. People probably wonder why I am always looking down in front of me. I am watching for potholes, rocks, glass and other debris that is on the sidewalk in front of me. 

With a mobile chair or scooter you must be very careful because it is like driving a bicycle, car or motorcycle. You don't want to go too fast and hit something or someone. Do not look around while moving and make sure you are looking in the direction you are driving. I always slow up before a driveway or an ally because someone could be coming out of it real fast. I had to stop suddenly when a bicycle came out of an ally that was next to a big building and rarely used. Unexpected! I stopped in time. There is a hidden drive into a parking lot to city hall along my route to the store. There is a large bush hiding it and if you don't know it is there it is dangerous. The bush hides you coming down the sidewalk so cars pulling out don't expect you. They can see the street looking both ways. So just be cautious. 

In my apartment I keep "Jazzy" in the bathroom in front of the shower. When I take a shower I have to move it a little ways away from the shower toward the sink. That means turning it on and moving it. I do not do it by sitting on it but standing in front of it. So moving it toward me could be dangerous if I was not paying attention. If I ran over my foot that would be one of the worst things I could imagine happening! Always watch your feet!! I charge it with the battery charger every time I have used it to go anywhere. Just plug it in after I get back home. That way it is always charged and ready to use.

The design of my small studio apartment is perfect for a disabled person and that is what they had in mind for all the apartments in my building. Not all of them are alike and the ones that seem the easiest to get around in are the studios. I believe I have taken things a step further in the way I use things and the aids I buy to assist me. Keeping an open floor plan is very important. So no coffee tables or unnecessary pieces of furniture in the way. No electric cords across the floor. Simple and easy is my motto! 

Copyright © 2023 Kathleen G. Lupole

All Photographs Copyright © 2023  Kathleen G. Lupole